THE Dirty Dozen and Bottom of The Barrel: Stormy Weather

Hello and welcome everybody...it's time for your FAVORITE column of the College Football Season---The Dirty Dozen and The Bottom of the Barrel.
For those of you unfamiliar, it's where you get to find out---from a semi-neutral party (me)....the Top 12 teams and the Bottom 5 teams in all of College Football along with the truly BEST and MOST RELIABLE predictions you can find on the Interwebs....
We always start in Week 3 for a simple reason: PRE-SEASON Rankings are STUPID (yes, I'm yelling). Those rankings are all based on reputation and speculation but not actual game play.
So why rank teams or talk about "Playoff" possibilities until they actually play games.....right??
Really at the end of the day...it is Alabama's world, we just all appear to be living in it. The Crimson Saban's are just that dang good...year after year after year. Though we should add on occasion an interloper does actually spoil the party....
The question we have---and well, just about everyone else: Will someone else cut in on the dance this season?
Right?
THE DIRTY DOZEN
1) Alabama 2-0. Yup. Ho hum, another season....another really good Alabama football team. What else is new, right? Jalen Hurts, Calvin Ridley, Bo Scarborough...and that's just a list of the Offensive stars. The defense is...well.
At the end of the day....the One...and Only, Nature Boy his ownself sums it all up...
This Week: vs. Colorado State, Our Pick: Alabama 43, Colorado St. 10
2) Oklahoma 2-0...yeah, beating Ohio St. in Columbus is a pretty good reason to be awarded a second place ranking. Beating the Buckeyes was imm-pressive. Baker Mayfield was awesome--though we don't know why he had to apologize for planting the OU flag on Ohio State's turf. Oh, and Lincoln Riley's defense rose to the occasion.
This Week: vs. Tulane, Our Pick: Oklahoma 47, Tulane 13
3) USC 2-0. After struggling w/Western Michigan in Week 1, there were questions. Lots of them. However a dominating win over Stanford on the heels of a huge performance by Sam Darnold, the Trojans have regained some swag. Will it remain??
This Week: vs. Texas, Our Pick: USC 41, Texas 20
4) Clemson 2-0. The Tigers absolutely STUFFED Auburn. The War Eagles got NOTHING against a big and really fast defense statistically the 2nd best in the country at this time. Kelly Bryant has been very good so far, yet another test lies ahead....
This Week: at Louisville; Our Pick: Louisville 37, Clemson 31 UPSET!!!!
5) Penn State 2-0. Yup, Penn State. James Franklin has quietly rebuilt the Nittany Lions into one heck of a good team. Though Coach Franklin maybe should have reconsidered comparing their arch rivals Pitt to Akron. Just a thought....
This Week: vs. Georgia State; Our Pick: Penn St. 43, Ga. State 17
6) Michigan 2-0; Oh, wow, that's 2 of the Top 6 from the Big10, the world she's a changing....The Wolverines defense appears to still be awesome despite the change in personnel. If the offense does anything--they'll be dangerous down the stretch.
This Week: vs. Air Force; Our Pick: Michigan 33, Air Force 10
7) LSU 2-0: Yes, that's right--the Fighting Ogeron's make OUR Top 12. And this is coming off a very unimpressive 2016. The Tigers have shown signs of life on both sides of the ball though the big tests are still yet to come.
This Week: at Mississippi State; Our Pick: LSU 27, Miss St. 23
8) Oklahoma St. 2-0: No, I'm not as sold on the Cowboys as Wilkie is they are habitual fast starters and slow finishers. And no, I don't feel they are better then Oklahoma. Yes, Mason Rudolph is experienced and talented--but I think not elite.
This Week: vs. TCU; Our Pick: Okie State 33, TCU 20
9) Washington 2-0: The Huskies surprised everyone last year, but can they do it again? An unimpressive start so far..with the tough games yet to be played. Jake Browning is a stud...it's just a question of the surrounding talent. And are they a soft West Coast team?? Only time will tell....
This Week: vs. Fresno; Our Pick: Washington 48, Fresno 21
10) Wisconsin 2-0: Um, yeah, another perennially disappointing team who always looks great early in the season. When push comes to shove--they always lose late. Always.
This Week: at BYU; Our Pick: Wisconsin 27, BYU 24
11) Louisville 2-0: As long as Lamar Jackson is healthy, this is a Top 10...or at least a Top 20 team. He's that damn good. No, Bobby Petrino still doesn't know what defense means and ultimately that will do his team in...but in the meantime--enjoy the ride
This Week: See #4
12) Ohio St. 1-1: This breaks with tradition, a one-loss team normally is not ranked this high. But on paper--the Buckeyes are still really talented and in theory should be in the hunt when the dust settles. Then again, we've been known to be wrong on occasion.
This Week: vs. Army; Our Pick: tOSU 43, Army 7
And now for the Highlight of our Show.....
THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL
We now present the teams deemed the Worst of the Worst. And if they want to get out of this list--the challenge is simple.
WIN!!!
5) UTEP 0-2: Hello Miners. Or should we say "Minors"? They sure have played like a bunch of youngins so far this season. Heck, even Rice pounded them, and that NEVER happens. So welcome to the club...see if you are able to get off the island here...
This Week: vs. Arizona; Our Pick: Arizona 31, UTEP 3
4)Charlotte 0-2: Woe are the 49ers. Much like their NFL Namesake, this is not a good football team and one that perhaps should have waited to jump up to the FBS. 14 points in 2 games is, well, not very good and says all you need to know.
This Week: vs. North Carolina A&T; Our Pick: A&T 17, Charlotte 7
3)Bowling Green 0-2: MAC Action,it's fannnntastic....right? The MAC has to have someone here and we can't think of anyone more worthy---ok, maybe UMass...but they're leaving the MAC. So congrats Falcons fan...you get the honor.
This Week: at Northwestern; Our Pick: Northwestern 31, Bowling Green 14
2) Massachusetts 0-3: Oh, wait. Um, yeah, we couldn't resist putting one of our favorite punching bags here. As a frequent flyer, well, they're always under consideration and the lack of performance in 2017 only reinforces the thought.
This Week: at Temple; Our Pick: Temple 33, UMass 21
1) Baylor 0-2: Yes...I believe Karma may be working at least a bit here as the once mighty Bears have lost to Liberty and...UT San Antonio in consecutive weeks. No, we--nor anyone else should feel sorry for them either, they earned this the hard way the past couple of years.
This Week: at Duke...heh heh...Our Pick: Duke 40, Baylor 0
If you made it this far and aren't a friend or family member--well, thanks. I do appreciate it, this is kind of a lot to digest. But we'll be here. Production time allowing---all season long. Try making your own picks and see if you can outsmart or do better.
And no, we don't pick the spread for a reason. I'm not a Las Vegas Bookie...nor have I ever claimed to be...